Type 1 Diabetes Diagnosis

January 9, 2012 is the day when my life changed forever, my whole world as I knew it crumbled around me. It felt like a dream to be honest, like I was gonna wake up and this burden would be gone. I still remember what I ate that morning before the doctor's, I ate my last banana without worry. Before that day I was slowly withering away, losing pounds, drinking more, infections non-stop, not eating, and overall feeling like absolute crap. Now I look back at my childhood and I realize that I never really felt good, I didn't know what it meant to feel just plain old good. It was always either I had a stomach ache, or my heels hurt or I had a headache. I remember just praying that maybe I would get an answer, maybe they could finally help me and stop telling me everything was ok. My wish came true, not in the way I wanted it to, but nonetheless my diagnosis of Type 1 Diabetes saved my life. I went into the doctors that morning weighing only 82 pounds at 5'3, I remember shaking as I sat in my chair because I was cold. I had taken a urine test and by the look of concern from our doctor I know something was wrong. We were then quickly ushered to the endocrinologist where we sat hoping and praying that everything was ok.

Everything was a blur from then on. My finger was pricked and then my blood was put into this weird machine. I heard a beep and the nurse looked down. She tightly closed her lips in a frown and nodded to the doctor, the meter read 540. I think I was in shock when I heard that one sentence "Well Missy, you have Type 1 Diabetes". My heart literally went into my throat, my eyes welled with tears as I looked back at the doctor. He saw me and replied with a snarky remark "At least you don't have cancer." I was no longer listening to the big words that the doctor told us. I was stunned but I felt something lift off my chest. I was relieved that they found something wrong because I knew there was. They gave me a bag of needles, a vile of insulin, and quickly took me over to the dietitian. I will always remember the butterfly paintings on the walls and the rustling of the needles in my bag as we quickly walked to the office. We were greeted by a kind lady but I wanted none of her kindness, I was confused and irritated like a wounded animal. All I remember from that visit is her forcing me to inject myself with insulin in my belly for the first time. It still brings anxiety as I write this passage. I can confidently say that, that was the worst day of my life but what came out of that day made the rest of my life better.

The hour of sobbing in the car followed by the pitiful looks from family and friends forced to acknowledge that I was no longer who I used to be. The days following diagnosis were slow and foreign but nonetheless my strong momma gave my the strength to pull through. We called the doctors everyday and took the insulin as instructed before every meal, because the doctors know best right? Doctors have some kind of information that we don't know. They have the power to control our health. Well I think a bit differently, I believe we each have a doctor inside us. After all, no one knows our body as well as we do. Four months after diagnosis, I forgot to take my insulin, uh oh. Before this happened, we decided to watch our diet closer and slowly started eliminating things such as wheat, dairy, and sugar. This caused me to have extreme lows and enabled me to take less insulin. So the days went on and the insulin slowly dwindled out of my life. My endocrinologist wasn't too happy about the fact that I was taking near to no insulin. Anyway, by August of that year I was completely off of all insulin. (I will tell you guys more about the elimination process in future posts)

Now here I am, two years later still trudging on the road less traveled. I am thankful for the opportunity to live a healthy life and to wander off the beaten path. I have my ups and downs, my struggles, and my victories. Nonetheless, I still have faith in our lifestyle each and everyday and I have willingness to do it for the rest of my life. On this blog I will share with you recipes that have made it a bit easier living a life without sugar, dairy, wheat, or grain; some of my workouts, and the struggles that I have as a teen with diabetes. I hope teens and adults alike can find this story to be a shimmer of hope. That there is in fact another way to manage type one diabetes.